Blended Living

• Its late and the quiet surrounds me
• I put on the funny Koss earbuds that block out external sounds and before I turn on the MP3 player its even quieter…
• such aural isolation can frighten yet it feels so good right now
• were my ears ringing all this time and I didn’t hear it over the NYC din?
• such thoughts and quests can wait
• I feel relief that the day is put to rest or will be soon
• the days filled with productive work, hard running, and strengthened relationships stretch my life
• like a rubber band one way
• to offer such restful sleep when my lively day yields to night and subconsciousness
• as the rubber snaps to the other side
• sure there are concerns and worries and the thoughts that pile on
• yet my resilience is so strong today that I know they will be tackled tomorrow
• if life is a football game, the ball was advanced today
• and then there is time to rest and think of the cheerleaders dancing their enticement
• and let the strategy come to me in my sleep for the next play
• but life isn’t a football game exactly
• we don’t have sponsors to support us
• nor do we have to cater to their brands
• we are in a way our own best cheerleader and sponsors
• its that quiet part of the cycle
• when we can hear everything that whispers inside
• the voices that yearn for attention
• the shouts of needs and screams of hurts upon our bodies and minds and souls
• the enticements leaked into our psyche by carefully NLP’ed ads
• you know the ones that resemble late night infomercials except that they run inside our skulls
• and they key in on our personalized fears and desires
• tricky aren’t they?
• these voices need to be listened to and put to rest, lest they come back again louder in the next refrain
• like a line at a new restaurant where you see a line and think that its important and decide you must eat there
• except you are standing in the line in front of and behind yourself
• be careful to notice this next time
• lest you fear or fool or drool yourself into thinking something is more important than it really is
• and now for some visions of gumdrops and lollipops and cheerleaders …

Its very quiet right now as I type this.  I can hear the keys tapping, and the distant sounds from my neighbors… and I don’t usually hear anything except when its late and dark like now.  I can hear my daughters snoring slightly from their room – and its very peaceful to me.  One of them has a slight cold coming on, or they are allergic to something.

There is one more day of school for them, then the holidays.  Their energy levels and excitement are starting to rise, as they anticipate the joys of the year end- in spiritual as well as physical terms.  They wonder what presents they will get, and they think on some level about how they have changed throughout the year, or rather how the world seems to have changed to them.  They anticipate the family and friends they will spend time with.

Its easy to be jaded as the years pass, to not get swept away in the excitement, or at least vicariously.  That is a shame to not allow ourselves the fine moments that we can experience each and every day.  To be present, to be mindful such that these daily gifts aren’t lost.

I’d much rather find it in me to perform a random act of kindness than to curse my enemies, or think poorly of another.  I’d rather work to find the beauty in each moment – as hard as that may be while on line at the bank, or store, or crowded into a train or bus.  Our thoughts and actions are such things that carry on and get duplicated.  Like the saying how we treat our children is how they will treat society.  How we treat each moment is how we will see how empty or full our lives are… and so on to the next person.   It can be contagious – for the better or worse.

Its quiet now.  But otherwise I couldn’t hear my little ones breathing and experience the simple joy that brings to me.